The breeze rustled through the trees in the darkness. Sidor watched the passing lights of the freeway above Riverfront Park, like a ghost. Sometimes, he just felt the need to get away from the hustle of the city. It could be so overcrowded. He sat on the edge of the riverbank, watching the water lap at the banks. There was freedom here. Quiet.
True, a few people were wandering back and forth- it was still early in the night, and although it was dark, it was perfectly possible to pick out movement.
He missed his home, and it infuriated him. Such a human weakness, something he should not experience anymore, something he didn't want to feel. He stood up, weighing a pebble in his hand and skipped it across the river. In his mind's eye, he saw pine trees weighted down with shining icicles, and the pebble bouncing from ice. So beautiful.
So lost.
He remembered the fire out amongst those trees, consuming the bodies of those who wouldn't stand on the side of the Crone. Martyrs. But not him. He had had the chance to escape, and taken it.
God's Will?
It must be God's Will that he had lived or he would not have done. No direct intervention was necessary. He was a pilgrim.
And yet, that little voice inside him murmured, there is so little purpose for you here. All you have learnt is that there are some among us who would throw aside their faith for fear of... what? Is yours so fragile? Are you?
He skipped another pebble across the river and stood up, dusting off his dark jacket where it had picked up dirt. The walk hadn't so much cleared his head as reinforced that seed of doubt. He would have to confess so much. The sacrament would ease it, he was certain.
A sacrament in Sacramento.
The word play amused him, and he laughed to himself, the shadows rippling across his face as they clung to him. Maybe he would head towards Downtown and feed tonight. He walked along the path towards the city, wondering if this was all the night held.