(Private)Welcome back!

[Seraphina]

“Dreams are fascinating things. I won’t begin to think I understand everything about them, but I think they are there to help, in some weird way. The person to ask would be Rhodes, he’s very knowledgeable about them, and might be able to offer some insight that could put your mind at ease.” If she wanted to ask him about it anyways.

She takes a moment to think about the words. “Maybe some choose what to believe because it fits what they’ve already decided. The truth can be hard to accept at times, and living in a fantasy world of lies in some way, makes life easier.” There was the saying about the truth hurting.

“Nothing wrong with being prepared, sometimes it’s all we can do.” And then hope for the best.

She did mention that didn’t she? Eyes drifting to her tea for a moment. “As I’ve become closer to the Wyrd, it’s, awakened part of me. The Fairest part, the one I never paid much attention to, the less desirable parts of being a Fairest, it’s louder now. Whatever I was shaped to be for my Keeper, it’s creeping at the edges. Almost like a second voice. It’s weird, and I’m not really happy about it, but I think if I try and stay grounded, I can overcome it.” Maybe. Well, for a bit. “I have to.” Almost a whisper, but with a determination to it.

The talk of various themes perks the Nix up, “Oh, those all sound wonderful! And I’ve done steam punk for Halloween once, never done pirate though. And fandoms? Haven’t really tried that yet.” A brief thoughtful look, “Too many!” laughing, “But I love any excuse to dress up in a costume! The whole putting the idea together and then getting to be someone else for the night?! It’s perfect!” to her anyways. “I say we pick a theme, and just go for it! We own the night!” cause they were both hot and it would be fun!

[Cassandra Reeding]

She'd thought about asking Rhodes before about her dreams. Maybe he would have some insight into exactly what her ability is stemming from, "I'll have to see about it. I've been meaning to do more research in the first place. Could be an interesting thing to get written down and added to the library and help is always good for that." Even though a good portion of it is personal. What if he did look into her dreams and saw certain secrets? No, don't let that paranoia get to you.


Cassandra nods, definitely agreeing with her statements, "In the past, I used to try so hard to convince people that their form of thinking can be illogical, especially when ethics are involved. I've found that often when someone comes to a conclusion not based in logic, they can't be logic-ed out of it. Truth is hard to accept, even more so when people find 'truth' subjective."


She nods again, "You're not wrong."


There is a moment when Cassandra realizes that this had been spoken of before, an accident, but this time further insight has been gained. Perhaps that is a plus, assuming Sera doesn't find it invading. "I can understand that. I know that there was a part of me that enjoyed who I was back there. My own importance to my Keeper. I thought I was loved in absolute and cherished for my abilities. Turns out an eighteen year old girl can be very deluded about what love is." Perhaps you still are deluded. She shakes that thought away. "I've rivaled against that nature for a long time, trying to understand the difference in that false love and true love, whether platonic or otherwise. That Fairest part is loud though. Wanting to be the center of attention whenever possible, to be loved like a queen. Whereas my natural nature just wants a small, close group of friends where I can just be who I am." And don't forget love. "Sorry, that was a long tangent." One she didn't entirely mean to go on. Sera just makes her feel comfortable enough to share. It's easy and for once, it feels good.


"Oh, yes! I remember your steam punk Halloween. That was a beautiful costume. I think you'd look great in pirate gear. Especially with some kind of hat with plume. Hair in real big waves, even though I know that would take forever for you to curl." She gets it. Her own hair is nearly always pin straight. "Let's do some research then. See if one of the nearby clubs is doing something cool. I know I can't wait for Halloween again. I've got a fun costume idea."

[Seraphina]

A nod of understanding, “I know he’d love to help.” Especially if Cassandra asked for the help. “He’s helped me quite a bit with my own Dreams and getting them figured out.” She had full faith in him. And not just because he was her husband, he earned that trust before they were wed. “And I agree, having more things to add to the library would be wonderful for the Freehold. I’ve seen putting the finishing touches on my memories of the Dragon and what happened. That way there is a written account.” But she wished she had gotten Sasha to put her memories into words.

Now that was something she couldn’t understand, “This is probably a stupid question, but, why? What’s to be gained from doing that?” stupid or not, she was curious. “Truth can be painful, and I think some people just are not mentally or emotionally ready to accept it. Throw in a romantic relationship or even a best friend, and those truths are even harder to accept.” If someone told her Rhodes was working with Them, would she believe it? She wouldn’t, and she wasn’t sure any evidence would convince her otherwise. Which was…terrifying.

“I, think, I enjoyed it as well. There was something, maybe comforting in it.” The words unsure. And then she couldn’t help it, there was a small snort and laugh, “Oh, isn’t that the truth.” She remembers when she was eighteen very well, too well. An absent nod, “I spent most of my childhood being throwing into the spotlight that I learned to despise it. I hated people looking at me, judging me, expecting me to smile and perform.” She had always been beautiful, the Wyrd just enhanced it. “And then it became a weapon.” Voice softer. “But yeah, that Fairest part, it gets louder.” Then her smile softens, “Nothing to be sorry for. I actually agree, give me a close group of friends any day of the year.” Could she work a crowd? Yes. Was she comfortable doing that? Yes. But it wasn’t something she went out of her way for.

A smile lights up her face, “Oh thank you!” she was proud of that one. “And think so? Hmmm.” Her mind working out various costume ideas. Laughing, “Yeah, that might take a bit. But what I’ve found works, is to wash my hair, then braid it. Once it dries, it has soft curls in it.” But she was sure Cassandra knew that trick. “I’m sure we’ll find a fun theme somewhere. And if not, like I said, we make our own!” want the Nix to wear a costume somewhere? Just let her know!

“Oh! We should throw a Halloween party this year! Rent out a place or something!” oh that would be fun! “Bet we could throw the best Halloween party in the city!” her voice filled with confidence.

[Cassandra Reeding]

She nods. There is a degree to which she feels this is inevitable, but instead of being something scary, it could end up being a very good thing for her. Good for the Freehold even. If she can learn how to harness this power, who knows the things she could end up doing for the Freehold.


"One day, I hope we figure out where the remains of the previous Autumn library are. But collecting our own knowledge will help as we start reading things to the collection. It's good you were able to put in your memories. That could come to help us in the future should anything like it happen again. In my old Freehold, we use to catalogue bits of our Durances we remember so that we have written accounts of some of the Keepers. It was always voluntary, but should the signs be seen in our world, we'd have other's experiences to pull from. Scary, maybe even slightly traumatizing trying to write it all down, but it was for a greater good."


Cassandra nods, one hundred percent agreeing, "I feel like it's because it makes people feel better somehow. They don't have to believe in a harsher or just clashing to their beliefs reality, you know? You're right, it makes it even harder when you start adding in people that others care about."


It was strange hearing someone echo how she felt about things, but she was glad Sera got a kick out of her teenage line. "I'm sorry you went through that kind of childhood. Somehow, some parents just don't know how to let children be children." That was one aspect that she was lucky. She was born to very loving parents who just wanted to see her succeed. It was what she hoped to be one day when she came back. Up until she realized that Changelings are infertile. And then came Eliza. She might not have been born to her, but she was every bit her child as if she had been. Her stomach drops a little bit. "Thank the stars for a close group of friends. And a close Freehold."


"Yes, that's what I end up doing most of the time. I actually keep my hair braided quite a bit. It's just easier to deal with when it gets this long," She's glad at least that the texture of her hair didn't lend it to getting too frizzy or tangled. Usually. Depending on the situation. "Very true. Sometimes the parties we make are the most fun."


The idea of doing their own Halloween get together brings a big smile to her face, "Oh, I would LOVE that. I'm sure that between us we can decorate the spookiest venue," considering her resources, it would be easy. "This might sound crazy, but if we know any nice prodigals, we might invite them too." Is that crazy? Sounds more like chaotic fun. What's the worst that could happen?

[Seraphina]

“That would be quite the discovery! But finding it might require contacting someone who was present and has seen it. And that list is quite small. Though I like to think we have a great group of people here who can use their skills to figure it out.” With Rhodes knowledge and how skilled Cassandra was with the Hedge direction, they could probably find it. And that would depend on if Rhodes wanted to find it and if he wanted to share it if he did find it. “I was only here for when the attack on the Dragon was planned and executed. But who knows, like you said, maybe someone in the future can use that knowledge to defend the Freehold once again.” Another Dragon would just fucking suck. But the Winters next words took her by surprise, “Did you actually have people who voluntarily gave that information? Because to be honest, I don’t think I could, even talking about it with Rhodes is very difficult.” But to write it down for others, others she didn’t trust, to just read?

“I agree with that, though I always wonder if it truly makes people feel better. Or is it just another delusion they’re feeding themselves. And is anyone really doing anyone else a service by allowing or continuing it.” She didn’t think so, she couldn’t see the kindness in it.

There was a shrug, “Thank you, but I like to think I actually came out stronger because of it.” She wasn’t sure how yet, but she thought she did. “Yeah, parents who try to relive their childhoods through their own kids are just, well, not parents in my opinion.” Maybe that was part of why she always encouraged those around her, no matter how out there their dreams and Desires were.

“That’s always been what helped keep me here and not want to move. There is this homey feel to how close everyone is, and that is lacking in some of the Freeholds I’ve passed through. Maybe it’s just me enjoying surrounding myself with those I can trust and count on, but I wouldn’t trade this Freehold and those who reside within for anything.” Not every Ling had that chance.

“Isn’t that the truth!” she says with a laugh, “I swear, it gets more and more difficult to manage. And the guys will never understand the struggle unless they have long hair as well.” The maintenance was unbelievable at times.

“You know it!” agreeing one hundred percent. “Finding the right venue should be first on the list, then we’ll know how much space we have to decorate.” Then they could have just the right amount. “I say we invite everyone and anyone! Show off our party planning and decorating skills!”

[Cassandra Reeding]

"Depends on what you find to be voluntary. Some people felt it a duty, even if it meant just divulging one little thing they remember, but others... well, I can only speak to my own experiences on that. I didn't for years. Never felt the need or want to, on top of it being too painful to even begin to discuss. The only thing I ever gave in the end was what happened just before. The tactic used. I can talk about being an idiot teenager. That's easy enough." And that's true for her. "Anything else though? No, I never did. Too paranoid for that."


She considers Sera's words before saying, "I think it can be both. Making them feel better by the delusion itself."


"Considering how strong you are and how important you've made yourself to be to this freehold, I definitely believe that statement." There is a split second though, thinking about her family that puts a sinking feeling in her gut. No, you've got chosen family now and that's what is important.


Cassandra nods, agreeing with her statements about the close freehold, "It's comforting, isn't it? Knowing people have your back here and that you've got family? I don't know what I would do without John and Gerrit. They're my rocks." Though John has been out of state for far longer than she's been able to properly handle. She knows he's got business to deal with, but it's been difficult to come home every night to an empty house.


That makes her laugh a little bit, "Yes, they really wouldn't. It's nice having long hair, but gods, is it a struggle."


"Sounds like a plan to me!" That would be more than exciting. They could definitely pull it off.

[Seraphina]

Her nod was solemn as she listened, “I’ve only shared bits and pieces with Rhodes, and even that was extremely difficult. So, I applaud you for being able to discuss any of it, that took some courage. For me, it’s just such a personal and painful experience that I’d rather not talk about it.” There was much she hadn’t told Rhodes, and she was sure there were things he hadn’t told her. They both respected that door. Who knows, maybe someday she could open it more.

A shy smile, “Thank you. It’s been a lot of work, getting to know myself better and improve where it was needed. But don’t discount how important you are as well to the Freehold. I’ve never seen someone navigate like you.” Unfortunately, that was the only Freehold experience she had with the Winter. But she was confident there was more.

Nod of agreement, “It is. And that’s a funny thing to have, given how untrusting we all are, to finally feel that comfort. It sort of came as a shock to me, but I came to embrace it.” Mhairi had helped with that. “They’re good guys, and I hope John is doing well.” It was weird not having him around. “Gerrit has been a bit of a tough one to figure out, but he seems like a great guy, I enjoy talking with him.” Winter had some good members.

An eye-roll as she laughs, “It is a struggle! I’ve debated cutting mine off, just to try shorter hair, but I have a fear the Wyrd would just bring it right back.” Considering how that’s how she got most of the length. “If I ever come across a Contract to make men’s hair grow long, I’m using it one a few in the Freehold.” Giggling. Let’s see how they manage.

“Great! We should probably start planning as soon as we can! Halloween isn’t too far away.” It was coming right up! Which Sera was excited about, it meant she could dress in a costume and not get judged. “So let me know when you have some free time and I’ll move my schedule around. Maybe we can each look up some decoration ideas and compare! But something tells me we’re going to be drawn to similar things.” A smile and nod.

One day left, we should prob start wrapping