Laughing, “You’re too kind. But I’ll keep that in mind when I try it, you’ll be the first to try it.” She thought it was ok, not her best, but it was a process. “But everyone has a a different idea on what makes a good beer, so maybe you just didn’t find one that fit your tastes.” It was true, there was a lot of different beers out there. Some good, some not.
Always good to know when something you felt was felt by someone else.
“Well, glad I’m not the only one who does that, stuff the feelings down and away.” But sounded like he found a way to deal with them. And for that, she felt jealous.
From the look on her face, she is listening and really paying attention. Like she’s trying to learn and file the information away. “Really? You just put it out there?” some disbelief in her voice. “Not sure I would be that brave.” A nervous chuckle.
“Want another one? Or something else?” she offers.
A nod, “I have to say, you sound different as well. There is more confidence in your words and actions. So you are doing something right. It’s nice to see.” Compliments the Shaman. “Must be rewarding to live like that.” Then a shake of her head, “Nothing to apologize for, I’m enjoying listening to you. You seem to have grown quite a bit.” Who would have thought?
A shrug, “I don’t fit the whole Thyrsus thing. I’m not like Anima or Skye, hell, I don’t even like dealing with Spirits. But I’ve always felt my Path didn’t define who I was and how I was. Maybe that’s just me.” But she wasn’t the stereotypical Shaman.
“That’s the scary part with being able to do that, is without enough proficiency, you can get lost in that form. I never transformed myself until I was at a Master level and actually have only done it once. Just don’t get too comfortable in those forms, then you might not come back. Then people are going to send me to find you and bring you back.” She jokes with a laugh.
“They tried to recruit me. Alastar. But the Arrows never felt like a place for me. Sure, I respect the hell out of what they do, and will always be there if needed. But fighting? Eh,” a shrug, “just not me. Though from what you’ve just described, I could do it. Ignoring physical pain, ignoring emotional pain, I got that in spades!” she declares with a chuckle. “Hey, even if you’re not an Arrow, I’d still fight beside you if you needed.” He was a good guy.
“I can understand that, losing yourself and your soul. I lost a piece of myself that day with the Seer’s. One I’ll never be able to get back. I’m not sure if it’s been bad for me or not yet, but it has me unsure and trying to figure shit out.” More confusing than her Path change? “Hmm.” She muses, thinking about what he’s said. “Well, I’ve had a drink with him, just to get to know him better. And he’s a very intelligent man, extremely guarded, but seems to have his heart and head in the right place. But I can see how others could be uncomfortable around him after what you’ve described. But maybe it’s different for me, because on some level, a small one, I can understand turning off emotions. I acted without thinking and turned three fucking Seer’s into fish. The fact of what I was doing didn’t dawn on me until after, until it clicked that I had murdered three people quite painfully. Could I do it again? Yes, if it meant defending those around me.” Without a doubt. But she didn’t want to, it was an interesting place.
Laughing again, “Then you do you. I think you have the confidence to handle whatever the name will bring your way. Though have you considered a manager? I hear they’re super useful in the acting business.” Might be worth it for him. “And I think people will see how honest and genuine you are. You’ve always been approachable in my opinion, so I think that will help you and go a long way.” Getting herself another beer, “Yeah, cause if you use ‘CJ’ then people will always ask you what it stands for. So just using Chris would make that easier. So, does Chris have an exciting past that drew him to acting?”