Feedback (Private)

**Aileen McFarlane** · Feb 23rd, 2014 04:34 PM

Aïleen dismissed with a wave of the hand the thanks she received from David. It was only natural, after all, even if her time was scarce. She listened to his position, and nodded once or twice to encourage him go further.

"I understand that you want to present objective, factual information. But the way you presented Alchemists, for instance, runs the risk of introducing some bias, don't you think ?" did she say, pointing her finger to the incriminating part. She then quickly asked further questions.

Also, if you wish to present raw data, you should mention whether this stance is one shared amongst all Kindred, or only Dragons. We have at heart an academic bias, which means your book would only apply to us, for instance."

After David asked whether it would be sound to introduce the Coil itself there, she had to agree with him. "Probably not, no. I'm probably going ahead of myself with all those questions. But doing a proper survey can be hard, as well as interpreting its data properly." She didn't know how to do it properly, of course, but from what she had heard Redfill say, it seemed as much like an art as a science.

"It's hard, David, I'm sorry if I'm not so helpful. At least, those are the questions that come to my mind..." she offered apologetically, once again.

Feb 23rd, 2014 06:34 PM

As he wrote a quick notation, David chuckled soundlessly off of Aileen's raised point on potential bias, “I've had a lot of responses from Alchemists over the years, even if I myself am a Pseudo-psychologist.” Finishing the note, reminding himself to tone down the section, David glances back up, “It's funny that we consider ourselves different schools given the attempts by Carl Jung and others to link psychology to alchemy.” The Mortician shrugs lightly.

Different to the point the Grand Wyrm of the Minneapolis Academy fostered that 'friendly rivalry.'

Nodding at her second point, David agrees, “I'll have to do that. The respondants for the survey were only Dragons, after all. Though, I do think that some of the main ideas that emerged from the survey can be applied universally.” Considering this for a moment, Aileen's concern was a solid one and one he'd have to use red-pens to address. “It is, however, a weakness that has to be addressed – especially in part two.”

A break follows, “Surveys are my favorite avenue of research. It is hard, like you said, but I like the challenge of it.”

Aileen's apology is then waved off with a hand, “A different set of eyes is always helpful. They can point out things I missed in my first edits. Like I mentioned at court, editing always takes a bit longer than the actual writing. Did,” David inquires, “you have any impressions from part two?”

**Aileen McFarlane** · Feb 27th, 2014 04:46 PM

As she watched him write down novel ideas, and edit some of his former ones, Aïleen's appraisal of her Cousin only rose. The dedication and care he showed to his... customers... showed in his writing as well. This was his genuine self, she was sure of it.

"I do, yes." did she reply when David invited her to go on.

"Part 1, chapter 2 seems fine by me, I don't have any comment on it. It's only too true, after all." she commented with a nod, and then moved on to the main bulk of the book.

"Part 2. Chapter 1. Understanding." She then paused. It was an entirely new venue of thoughts to her, and she had had to read it carefully over and over to let it all sink. "You know, those ideas... mtDNA, genetic memory, our Hunger as a craving for Experience... it's a lot to take in." she admitted. "In all fairness, I can't properly contribute to it. This theory is very much a scientific one, though, and could perhaps be expanded upon with a testing protocol to assess its strengths." the Mekhet offered to David.

"Also it is a lead to account for Hunger, how does it explain all the other things, and most notable our Disciplines, though ?" and after a short while, she added "The Sleep of Ages being a time of very low blood, the Dreams and Nightmares would be our mind's mad cravings ?" she asked.

Feb 28th, 2014 02:53 PM

While Aileen spoke, David removed his blazer; letting it drape on the back of the chair he sat on. It was only a matter of time, really. David had a penchant for rolling his sleeves to his elbows. He was doing that very thing as he listened to Aileen's assessment of the remaining parts of the book. With his hands folded on the table and David leaning forward, he asked, “Understanding isn't too technical is it?”

“Or, did I explain those technicalities enough?” David further inquired, “I don't want to lose the reader. It's important that this part of the theory is as accessible as possible.” A concern that could really only come from a pseudo-psychologist who, unlike their Theosophist cousins, don't have their own nomenclatures.

“You bring up a good point, though,” David adds glancing towards Aileen and referring to testing, “After I gave you and the Grand Wyrm this draft I thought of an idea: Past-Life Regression. At least, as a way to try to further explore the memories in our own blood.” Who knew that the river Lethe was a river of blood?

This served as a lead-in into answering some of Aileen's questions, nodding once, “It's my belief that Vitae is the vector for not just Experience but for Memory as well – if one considers them as separate concepts anyway. This is why I believe we Hunger.” David starts, flipping a page of his notebook and ripping out a sheet and putting it before Aileen and himself. “In fact, we should consider Memory at the center,” writing the word and circling it.

“The Vitae that Embraces us, is of course, far more potent than Human Blood. I believe this is because the memories within it are far more concentrated and this is passed on, unbroken, from sire to childe since time immemorial.” David pauses checking to see if Aileen has a question here. “In essence, our Vitae carries with it the experiences, memories, and knowledge of our sires, our grandsires and down the line. Being active contributes to our pool of memories and Human Experience is vital to its upkeep.”

“Now, with Disciplines, it isn't so much learning how to apply Vitae in a specific way so much as it is triggering Vitae to remember how to apply it in a specific way. At Embrace, for instance, our own experiences serve as a memory trigger which causes some abilities to 'be remembered' over others.” For David, his dying wish to disappear and his life before caused his vitae to instantly remember how. “Some disciplines, however, are – because of Clan differences – harder, if not impossible, for our Vitae to remember by itself.”

A break before adding, “Individual bloodlines, I believe, represent a permanent mutation forced upon that pool by their progenitor and are impossible to be remembered in Vitae because that mutation isn't present with other Kindred.”

On the left side of Memories, David writes Disciplines, circles it, and connects it with Memories.

Just after, David writes Torpor on the right hand side of Memories, “You are completely right that the Sleep represents very low-blood. Without it, I believe, the Vitae that remains within the Sleeping person would begin to forget its memories – atrophy if you will. The Egyptians called this the True Name. What Vitae forgets and in what order though, would have to be examined far more closely.” Circling the word Torpor, he connects that with Memory as well, “Now, with Kine, sleep is far more important than they give it credit for. Dreams, some believe are borne from Memories being re-arranged, much like a hard-drive defragments itself, to make those memories easier to remember. I'll need to read more on Cognitive Memory Science to be more acquainted on the subject.”

David pauses, a glint in his eye, “But, with that in mind what can we derive and theorize for a Kindred in Sleep? Could it be that Vitae arranges the memories in it to retain the most important first? Does Vitae attempt to bring memories that it feels we need to the fore? Does Vitae work with our subconscious or the Sahu and Khu in some way we haven't found yet?” The fact his Egyptian thinking sneaks in here, suggests that his theories – though seemingly agnostic – aren't so separate.

Suddenly realizing he's been talking for a bit, he bashfully adds, “I thought talking about all of this would derail the book on overcoming Hunger.”

OOC

**Aileen McFarlane** · Mar 11th, 2014 06:15 PM

Listening to David's passionate explanation, Aïleen understood how her Cousin had managed to conduct and write such a book. He was a man of passion. Few would believe it at first glance, but he was animated with a drive that few matched, in her opinion.

She assured him that she understood his points, but feared to push him to another long talk, and instead quickly focused back on the draft she had been entrusted with. She notably didn't talk about calorie, and the energy required to animate a body. How calorie and Memory-in-the-blood relates was probably beyond the point. Not to mention that it raised the question of the influence of the Blood ingested on one's behaviour... does the blood of a Saint make you more likely to become one ? what about the blood of a lunatic ?

Instead, she went back to Chapter 2.

"Once again, I don't think your survey part needs editing." she said with a smile of appreciation.

The brunette tapped on the Part 2 chapter instead. "All those hints you give about possible means to learn the Coil of Hunger are great. This is really helpful..." she nodded in thanks and recognition of the hard work, and went on with what she had on her mind then. "And how did you work on this issue, David ?" she asked with an inviting smile. He had not added himself in the survey, had he ?

Mar 12th, 2014 09:36 AM

A note of self-consciousness remained with David as Aileen assured him of the lucidity of the points he made. His left hand ran through his hair, as much habit as it was a nervous tic. David's lecture was the most he has spoken in a few days and if he were still mortal, he would have reached for a glass of water to hide behind.

It was always the painfully shy who concealed vast internal landscapes.

“Thanks,” David said succinctly, glancing at Aileen for a brief moment.

With that, David decided he was one-step closer towards publishing the work for the Academy. Aileen's question on how he overcame his hunger however, gave David pause. A flash of memory and Johan's stern voice, surfaced in the fringes of his consciousness.

“It was difficult,” David says quietly, his normal soft-spoken tones now taking on an introspective timbre, “and under the watchful eye of my sire, Initiate Fisher, we used many methods.” Another small pause as he adds, “I fasted, gaining an appreciation for what hunger truly feels like; not shying away at how it gnaws on the mind. I fed carefully, paying close attention to how the Kindred body absorbs Vitae. I also explored some of the properties of Vitae: how it feels when we wake, use it to warm our flesh, and lends us a quick bout of strength.”

David grew still after he said that. Even under the sharp gaze of his Father, David's experience with Change held both failures and successes. No one ever said that walking the Coils was an easy proposition. Finally, David looked towards Aileen, a closed lipped smile brushing his features, “But, nothing worth doing is ever easy.”

**Aileen McFarlane** · Mar 12th, 2014 05:05 PM

If there was any innuendo in David's last words, it was lost to Aïleen as she tried to picture in her mind's eye what training for that Coil could be like. Obviously, her achievement in the Coil of the Beast would be a great boon to train more safely, and she was glad she had worked on this first.

"Someday, I'll walk this path too." she said thoughtfully. "On that day, I hope you will agree to oversee my training, David. I can see how it could have been hard on you..." she emphasized with her own training regimen based on repeated burning... "You have obviously gained an extensive understanding of that Coil." she said as a praise.

Mar 12th, 2014 07:43 PM

One past-night, deep in Minneapolis, the usually reserved Johan sat his childe down. His childe was deeply hungry, the nest of birds in his veins were screeching with a desire for blood, Life. David almost could not hear Johan's voice as it attempted to cut through a cacophony Johan did not hear. 'It is to spare you,' Johan stated with a brutalist's version of simplicity.

It wasn't the only reason of course, it never was with Johan Fisher, but it was a main reason.

“I'll be there,” David says to Aileen, “if you need me. I'll be glad to give any advice you might need.” His gaze swept over to the window of the Library; the white lace-curtains, fluttering on currents of air. “If my work here,” gesturing to the manuscript, “inspires or helps you in any way, then I would have done what I set out to do.”

If Aileen knew Johan's reason, she might have agreed with it. Who knows if gentle David would have continued to withstand the unique requirements the cycle of feeding required without the Coil. It still boggled David's mind just how many people he, himself, has taken from to survive to this night, to this place in Sacramento, to his chair sitting across from Aileen.

David deeply disliked himself when he was forced to hunt. Maybe that showed just how humane David still was.

'It was to spare you...'

OOC

**Aileen McFarlane** · Mar 13th, 2014 05:48 PM

OOC

"Then you can already consider your work a success, David." the shy Mekhet said to her Cousin. Why she had set out on a path for the close future, Aïleen now had a better grasp on the hardship she could hope to prevail upon by studying that Coil, and it was true it would be nice. She had taken a different approach, but it didn't mean it couldn't complement it nicely. After all, it meant her unlife would be less of a hassle... more time to float around in the water, she mused, her gaze lost in the darkness outside.

Two Shadows among shadows. Monsters in the dark.

End Scene.

Feedback (Private)

Similar Threads

Out and About (Private)

Nox Why Not? (Private)

Feedback at the Comedy Club

At the Gym (Private)

(Private) Just an FYI