Wah wah, left me at the concourse
can't help it beat it like a dead horse
just can't get over you, just can't get over yoooo-ooo-oo-ooooou
little lady empty eyes, heart of solid lead
thought I fell in love with her, n' I got thrown away instead
shouldda learned my lesson, but I'm comin' back again
cuz even though she's cold as ice, her butt's a solid TEN!
The music is childish, vapid, and for some reason engagingly campy. The performers have dolled themselves up in painstaking parody of the Hair Metal greats, (whereas great is a relative term) and play their part with infectious energy and theatrical flair.
Dicky rides along with the kine mass up front for a few songs, thrashing and grinning and singing along clumsily with the chorus. His dead heart may not have any excitement of its own, but its emptiness can capture and echo the raucousness of the crowd. For a moment, jumping up and down like an idiot in a faceless throng, Dicky almost feels alive again.
Pulling away, Dicky finds the quietest spot he can and pulls out his phone.
Tap, tap, tap.