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Crystal comes to Kaze's Sanctum

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  1. #11
    Kaze's Avatar
    Striking Looks
    (An Extremely Fit and Healthy Glow)
    Presence
    (Disconcertingly easy to talk to and open up)
    Toxin Resistance
    (+2 vs drugs, alcohol and toxins)
    New Identity(Steven Chojun Trueheart)
    Kaze

    Nimbus. The sound of rushing wind and flashes of lightning surround Kaze, and his clothes and hair move as if he is in a windstorm.
    Monthly Rits

    Monthly Rits Spell Cloaks Spells do not show unless scrutinized
    Transform Aura pot 1 (Aura is as a Sleeper)
    Organic Resilience (Life Mage Armor 2e) pot 3 ( Armor 2; Defense 2 + Higher of Dex or Wits)
    Body Mastery pot 1 (x2 rate healing Bash, Letha, Agravated; +1 success on all extended and instant rolls to resist diseases, poisons or drugs; +100 years lifespan)

    Scene specific spells: in mini-sheet 4
    Scene Specific

    (Portrait) Portrait of an Angel
    Health:
    Mana:
    WP:
    Armor 3 ( +1 vs Bashing: Kung Fu 1)
    Defense 5
    Vulgar -1
    Active Spells: 3/5
    Personal Spells: 3
    Spell Tolerance: 3/3 Spell Rolls
    [1]Transform Aura[M]
    [2] Supernal Vision[D]
    [2] Organic Resilience[M]
    Key: Potency | Effect declaration if needed | Turns remaining ("M" = Monthly Ritual)

    (Bad House) The Return
    Health:
    Mana:
    WP:
    Armor 3 ( +1 vs Bashing: Kung Fu 1)
    Defense 9 (Dex 6 from Honing the Form)
    Vulgar -1
    Active Spells: 3/5
    Personal Spells: 3
    Spell Tolerance: 3/3 Spell Rolls
    [4] Honing the Form
    [3] Organic Resilience Aurora's Life 5
    [2] Body Control [M]
    Key: Potency | Effect declaration if needed | Turns remaining ("M" = Monthly Ritual)

    +2
    SL
    3
    PRE

    "Oh hey, if you're getting all 'entropy wins' on me, we gotta drink some more before we can go there!" Kaze says, pouring out another round and grinning.

    "Seriously though. I think it's all about control. We have free will, to make choices, but we can get all wrapped up in thinking that should mean we have control over the outcome, the consequences of our choices, you know?" Kaze says after they've both had another drink.

    "It's a balance. You decide. And then you find out what happens. Any other way...well, it just stresses me out and depresses me to try to control it."

    Kaze shrugs. "And not deciding at all...is a decision too. I think you can't judge your decisions based on how close they come to creating what you want. You have to have something to go by, making decisions, like a standard or something that you believe is worth keeping no matter what the consequences. If you judge everything you do by the outcome...I think that would drive me crazy."
    Spells: Monthly Rits Transform Aura (aura appears to be a sleeper) Spell Cloaks (See mini-sheet)

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  3. #12
    Crystal's Avatar
    Striking Looks
    (Captivating)
    Manipulation
    (Disarming)
    Resources
    Barfly
    Eidetic Memory
    Crystal

    Nimbus

    Walls and the Floor become slightly tilted, there's a sickly sweet and sharp smell in the air. Faintly, the sound chains (and even fainter: the sound of leather) can be heard. More powerful spells make the sounds more pronounced and colors seem to pulsate.
    Active Stats

    Astral Dive II
    Health:
    Mana:
    WP:
    Armor 0
    Defense 2

    Vulgar +/-0
    Active Spells: 1/4
    Personal Spells: 1

    [2] Third Eye
    [4R] Misperception

    +1
    SL
    3
    PRE

    The alcohol burned as it went down, but that at least was a familiar feeling. Talk about going all entropy. He accepted the refill and looked down on his drink.

    "So.. say we make shitty choices and fall on our faces. Why do we have to keep prodding, why keep trying? Why not take the logical consequence and close the door on all of this?" It was easy to blame to alcohol but the truth was, there was a lot of pent up anxiety and guilt inside the Warlock and this was maybe the first time he felt close to comfortable enough to let some of it out. "The responsibility, the danger - and for what? Yeah, we saw behind the Lie and know what's really up. Whoop-de-fucking-doo! I don't feel empowered, I don't feel ascended or anything."

    He looked up at Kaze, his face without any expression for probably the first time since Kaze had seen him. "I feel like some poor jerk taken out of the shallow comfortable pool of ignorance and being thrown into the deep end. It sucks."

    The Mastigos winced and took a big sip of Whisky. "You talk about control, but I don't even know how much control we have over all of this. I shouldn't judge things by their outcome, but most of the time it feels like even the process is shit." Not to mention he didn't feel like that's something you could just go around and admit freely - every other Awakened seemed just so sure of themselves, how could Crystal dare to speak up and confess he was flying blindly?

    A sigh, then the glass got emptied again. "They stick us together with mentors and teachers, they say we should look for answers within our souls and if you're unlucky that means you deal with all the Supernal crap following the advice of some loser and a glorified gut feeling. Now what's so good about making decisions with those kind of conditions, huh?"
    Health: Willpower: Mana:


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  5. #13
    Kaze's Avatar
    Striking Looks
    (An Extremely Fit and Healthy Glow)
    Presence
    (Disconcertingly easy to talk to and open up)
    Toxin Resistance
    (+2 vs drugs, alcohol and toxins)
    New Identity(Steven Chojun Trueheart)
    Kaze

    Nimbus. The sound of rushing wind and flashes of lightning surround Kaze, and his clothes and hair move as if he is in a windstorm.
    Monthly Rits

    Monthly Rits Spell Cloaks Spells do not show unless scrutinized
    Transform Aura pot 1 (Aura is as a Sleeper)
    Organic Resilience (Life Mage Armor 2e) pot 3 ( Armor 2; Defense 2 + Higher of Dex or Wits)
    Body Mastery pot 1 (x2 rate healing Bash, Letha, Agravated; +1 success on all extended and instant rolls to resist diseases, poisons or drugs; +100 years lifespan)

    Scene specific spells: in mini-sheet 4
    Scene Specific

    (Portrait) Portrait of an Angel
    Health:
    Mana:
    WP:
    Armor 3 ( +1 vs Bashing: Kung Fu 1)
    Defense 5
    Vulgar -1
    Active Spells: 3/5
    Personal Spells: 3
    Spell Tolerance: 3/3 Spell Rolls
    [1]Transform Aura[M]
    [2] Supernal Vision[D]
    [2] Organic Resilience[M]
    Key: Potency | Effect declaration if needed | Turns remaining ("M" = Monthly Ritual)

    (Bad House) The Return
    Health:
    Mana:
    WP:
    Armor 3 ( +1 vs Bashing: Kung Fu 1)
    Defense 9 (Dex 6 from Honing the Form)
    Vulgar -1
    Active Spells: 3/5
    Personal Spells: 3
    Spell Tolerance: 3/3 Spell Rolls
    [4] Honing the Form
    [3] Organic Resilience Aurora's Life 5
    [2] Body Control [M]
    Key: Potency | Effect declaration if needed | Turns remaining ("M" = Monthly Ritual)

    +2
    SL
    3
    PRE

    Kaze sets down his drink and listens. Wow. This sounds like it's been bugging Crystal for a while.

    Kaze nods. "Yeah." He says. "I mean, I tried to find purpose in my Order, as an Arrow. It's weird though...it really just confused me more, the harder I tried. I finally felt like that was because I wasn't really right for the Arrows. Since then...I ended up finding my Way based on what was important to me before my Awakening. My mom's faith. I kind of leaned on hers, until she died, and then I didn't really know what I believed in. Then I Awakened, and I guess I sort of made the Arrows into my religion. Which totally didn't work, for me. Phoenyx is a True Believer. It's the only religion she needs, I think."

    Kaze shrugs. "Obrimos thing, I guess." He says.

    "So...I mean, maybe the Path is where you go for meaning, for direction. For me...I am feeling pretty hopeful, but I kind of had to go back and reassess, you know, like way back. I ended up finding out what my mom believed...I believed it too. That made a lot of things more clear for me." Kaze says gently.
    Spells: Monthly Rits Transform Aura (aura appears to be a sleeper) Spell Cloaks (See mini-sheet)

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  7. #14
    Crystal's Avatar
    Striking Looks
    (Captivating)
    Manipulation
    (Disarming)
    Resources
    Barfly
    Eidetic Memory
    Crystal

    Nimbus

    Walls and the Floor become slightly tilted, there's a sickly sweet and sharp smell in the air. Faintly, the sound chains (and even fainter: the sound of leather) can be heard. More powerful spells make the sounds more pronounced and colors seem to pulsate.
    Active Stats

    Astral Dive II
    Health:
    Mana:
    WP:
    Armor 0
    Defense 2

    Vulgar +/-0
    Active Spells: 1/4
    Personal Spells: 1

    [2] Third Eye
    [4R] Misperception

    +1
    SL
    3
    PRE

    Crystal thought back to the Mysterium meeting. A whole lot of nothing, when you boiled it down. Was Sacramento really just a place where ambition came to die? "Yeah I don't know. They got me into the Mysterium claiming knowledge was power. Then they kind of fucked me over once I wanted to use that power and the Order here is just a glorified book club. I mean, no offense, but it all seems kind of directionless." Did that mean that he didn't believe in the Order's tenets? Maybe, maybe not. Maybe he just took out his frustration on those who couldn't really be blamed for it.

    "So you really think that God or whatever made you Awake? That you're following some divine plan?" He leaned back and considered for a moment. His parents weren't big in any belief, and as a Mastigos what kind of direction did he have? "So I guess I have to look into being more of a controlling asshole? Or do I just work towards defying the stereotypes and be a goody-two-shoes? What kind of shit is that? I mean, I don't even know if there's another member of my Path around." His mentor was an Obrimos himself - unfortunately he had also never provided satisfactory answers as of now.

    A big, exaggerated groan. "Sorry man, I don't want to piss all over your beliefs but I don't know if your plan is going to work for me. Appreciate the try though." He looked at his empty glass, then got up with a slight stagger to fill it up again. Was there any more point in talking about it? Maybe he just had to work harder at burying those feelings beneath bottled good feelings.

    "So, wanna tell me about your date?"
    Health: Willpower: Mana:


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  9. #15
    Kaze's Avatar
    Striking Looks
    (An Extremely Fit and Healthy Glow)
    Presence
    (Disconcertingly easy to talk to and open up)
    Toxin Resistance
    (+2 vs drugs, alcohol and toxins)
    New Identity(Steven Chojun Trueheart)
    Kaze

    Nimbus. The sound of rushing wind and flashes of lightning surround Kaze, and his clothes and hair move as if he is in a windstorm.
    Monthly Rits

    Monthly Rits Spell Cloaks Spells do not show unless scrutinized
    Transform Aura pot 1 (Aura is as a Sleeper)
    Organic Resilience (Life Mage Armor 2e) pot 3 ( Armor 2; Defense 2 + Higher of Dex or Wits)
    Body Mastery pot 1 (x2 rate healing Bash, Letha, Agravated; +1 success on all extended and instant rolls to resist diseases, poisons or drugs; +100 years lifespan)

    Scene specific spells: in mini-sheet 4
    Scene Specific

    (Portrait) Portrait of an Angel
    Health:
    Mana:
    WP:
    Armor 3 ( +1 vs Bashing: Kung Fu 1)
    Defense 5
    Vulgar -1
    Active Spells: 3/5
    Personal Spells: 3
    Spell Tolerance: 3/3 Spell Rolls
    [1]Transform Aura[M]
    [2] Supernal Vision[D]
    [2] Organic Resilience[M]
    Key: Potency | Effect declaration if needed | Turns remaining ("M" = Monthly Ritual)

    (Bad House) The Return
    Health:
    Mana:
    WP:
    Armor 3 ( +1 vs Bashing: Kung Fu 1)
    Defense 9 (Dex 6 from Honing the Form)
    Vulgar -1
    Active Spells: 3/5
    Personal Spells: 3
    Spell Tolerance: 3/3 Spell Rolls
    [4] Honing the Form
    [3] Organic Resilience Aurora's Life 5
    [2] Body Control [M]
    Key: Potency | Effect declaration if needed | Turns remaining ("M" = Monthly Ritual)

    +2
    SL
    3
    PRE

    Kaze listens with interest when Crystal describes his experience in the Mysterium. He realizes, not for the first time that he really has very little first hand knowledge of what the Orders are like, apart from the Arrows. It occurs to him for the first time that as an Apostate, it might be a good opportunity to reach out and find out more from people what their Orders are like. Preferably from members who AREN'T in the middle of an existential crisis and not very high on their Order at the moment, though.

    Corn seems pretty gung ho on his Order. Kaze should ask him about it, or Aurora. Probably it's a lot of reading indoors, which was his impression and totally doesn't seem right for him, but hey, he should at least ask.

    The Guardians are a hard pass though. He doesn't want to learn more about them. That still leaves the other Orders though. Huh. Really he already kind of picked Naga's brain about the Ladder. So...that leaves the Free Council. Funny, hanging with Shodan it never really came up. Hm...somehow, Anima doesn't seem like the one to ask. So that leaves. Puck. Sure, why not?

    "Yeah. I mean, I told you my only real experience with an Order." Kaze says. "I would guess maybe your Order has a direction...just it might not feel like the direction you're going in." He shrugs. "Not that I'm trying to sell you on being an Apostate or anything." Kaze says with a smirk. "There is no benefit plan at all."

    "Anyway," Kaze says, "I honestly kind of feel like this place is more influenced by Cabals for direction than by Orders or Paths."

    Then Crystal does it. He asks about Kaze's religious beliefs. "Absolutely. I do." Is all Kaze says, with complete sincerity. If Crystal wants to know more, he's going to have to show it. Kaze is not going to say or do anything that could feel like he's springing a trap or taking advantage of a moment of weakness in his friend to push his religion on him. He's here for Crystal, as his friend. That's all he wants to communicate, loud and clear.

    Then Crystal talks about personal goals. Like what kind of character to develop. "Hey, I heard something once I liked. A young man climbs the mountain to ask a wise man who lives at the top what career he should try for." Kaze says, grinning, "The wise man told him, 'Try to be a good person. There's plenty of opportunity, and not a lot of competition!" Kaze laughs. "Trying to be a 'goodie two shoes' isn't a bad thing, depending on why you're doing it. If you're trying to do it to prove something, or change other people, like make them like you or make them sign on to whatever 'being good' means to you, then no, bad idea."

    Kaze smiles when Crystal apologizes. "Hey, no worries Dude. Seriously, my faith has been tested a lot more than that. I know you're not trying to put me down, anyway." He says.

    Kaze sighs when they come back to Jenna. "Well. There's not as much to tell as you might think. I mean...we held hands, like once." He says with a laugh! "We're both big fans of 'taking it slow'. Honestly, we haven't even decided if we're more than friends. Right now we're basically 'friends with possibility of more'."

    "Unless...."
    Kaze gasps and makes a sudden mock expression of horror! "What if she's been sucking my blood this whole time and making me forget! Oh no! I guess you'll just have to read my mind and find out, 'Mister Mentalist'!" He says with finger quotes, cracking up and laughing hysterically!

    "Yeah," Kaze says still laughing, "I caught your mentalist act at the party. Great job!"
    Spells: Monthly Rits Transform Aura (aura appears to be a sleeper) Spell Cloaks (See mini-sheet)

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  11. #16
    Crystal's Avatar
    Striking Looks
    (Captivating)
    Manipulation
    (Disarming)
    Resources
    Barfly
    Eidetic Memory
    Crystal

    Nimbus

    Walls and the Floor become slightly tilted, there's a sickly sweet and sharp smell in the air. Faintly, the sound chains (and even fainter: the sound of leather) can be heard. More powerful spells make the sounds more pronounced and colors seem to pulsate.
    Active Stats

    Astral Dive II
    Health:
    Mana:
    WP:
    Armor 0
    Defense 2

    Vulgar +/-0
    Active Spells: 1/4
    Personal Spells: 1

    [2] Third Eye
    [4R] Misperception

    +1
    SL
    3
    PRE

    "Well, but here's where we're back at square one: I don't know what direction I'm supposed to go." Which would mean that the problem wasn't with the Order, but with Crystal and that was certainly not and idea he'd like to entertain at the moment.

    Two eyebrows raised at Kaze's confident answer concerning his belief. "So, tell me about it. Let me see the light." Maybe it would already help hear anyone talk about something with conviction.

    Then the conversation turned philosophical. "I mean, what does being a good person even mean? That's just more opinionized shit for anyone to justify whatever they feel like doing. Well tough luck: I feel like blasting my consciousness out of this miserable existence as often as possible and have a good time. And dare I say: I'm pretty fucking good at it." The way he's been worked up and the quickly downed alcohol has made him slip up slightly. Whatever.
    "But to humour you: does being 'good' mean to bring good into the world? Feed the hungry, shelter the homeless? Should we be using Magic to accomplish that or would that mess too much with the Abyss? Then there's this Myth about bringing the Sleepers back to their old potential and working on raising the fallen world again but that seems to be as much bullshit as any other utopian dream of the Sleepers."


    He slumped down with his fresh drink and took a sip when Kaze talked about the Vampire lady. What was her name again? He came up blank. "That's nice, just be careful." He was mostly talking about her being a Vampire, but also about the host of problems relationships could bring. He simply wasn't a believer in those, but he didn't want to curb Kaze's enthusiasm either.

    Then Kaze tried to lighten the mood with his mind-reading joke and Crystal stiffened up. Memories of that drunk fuckboy and the equally shitfaced freshly Awakened came back to him, that poor guy who just wanted to see the awesome Mind Magic Crystal had been bragging about the whole evening.
    He washed the memories down with another shot of liquor and looked directly at the Obrimos. "Hey. Don't." Then he remembered that this was not some rando, Kaze was the only person in Sacramento that maybe could pass as a friend and he deserved better. His voice softened a bit. "I was just trying not to talk about anything touchy and I had to add some proof to my bullshit story. I had to."
    Health: Willpower: Mana:


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  13. #17
    Kaze's Avatar
    Striking Looks
    (An Extremely Fit and Healthy Glow)
    Presence
    (Disconcertingly easy to talk to and open up)
    Toxin Resistance
    (+2 vs drugs, alcohol and toxins)
    New Identity(Steven Chojun Trueheart)
    Kaze

    Nimbus. The sound of rushing wind and flashes of lightning surround Kaze, and his clothes and hair move as if he is in a windstorm.
    Monthly Rits

    Monthly Rits Spell Cloaks Spells do not show unless scrutinized
    Transform Aura pot 1 (Aura is as a Sleeper)
    Organic Resilience (Life Mage Armor 2e) pot 3 ( Armor 2; Defense 2 + Higher of Dex or Wits)
    Body Mastery pot 1 (x2 rate healing Bash, Letha, Agravated; +1 success on all extended and instant rolls to resist diseases, poisons or drugs; +100 years lifespan)

    Scene specific spells: in mini-sheet 4
    Scene Specific

    (Portrait) Portrait of an Angel
    Health:
    Mana:
    WP:
    Armor 3 ( +1 vs Bashing: Kung Fu 1)
    Defense 5
    Vulgar -1
    Active Spells: 3/5
    Personal Spells: 3
    Spell Tolerance: 3/3 Spell Rolls
    [1]Transform Aura[M]
    [2] Supernal Vision[D]
    [2] Organic Resilience[M]
    Key: Potency | Effect declaration if needed | Turns remaining ("M" = Monthly Ritual)

    (Bad House) The Return
    Health:
    Mana:
    WP:
    Armor 3 ( +1 vs Bashing: Kung Fu 1)
    Defense 9 (Dex 6 from Honing the Form)
    Vulgar -1
    Active Spells: 3/5
    Personal Spells: 3
    Spell Tolerance: 3/3 Spell Rolls
    [4] Honing the Form
    [3] Organic Resilience Aurora's Life 5
    [2] Body Control [M]
    Key: Potency | Effect declaration if needed | Turns remaining ("M" = Monthly Ritual)

    +2
    SL
    3
    PRE

    Kaze nods, smiles when Crystal says that he doesn't know what direction to go in life. "Yeah. You know, right, I'm not trying to tell you what to do? I'm just telling what I do, which might totally not work or already be something you tried for you?" He qualifies.

    "Anyway, 'direction in life' for me was kind of about being afraid of screwing up. Remember that saying about 'Slow is smooth, smooth is fast'? 'Festina Lente, make haste slowly'?"
    He asks. "I think for me, it works out as taking things day by day, not having to feel like I have a big master plan, a 'where do I see myself in five years' thing, you know?"

    Kaze shrugs. "For some people, not having that would probably stress them out more, but for me...I feel like I have to be 'in the moment', you know? Trying to have a big plan tended to make me not really focus on just 'being' with who and what was around at the moment, you know? Like...isolating, getting into my own head and just in general stressing myself out." He explains.

    "So...for me, 'direction' is something I'm not as worried about now. Like right now, being here with you, I don't have an agenda. I'm just...being here with you, taking it as it comes and focusing on us, here and now."

    Crystal comes back to the God thing. Kaze sighs. "Yeah. Okay. It's kind of hard to explain, so...just remember, I'm just trying to answer your question, okay?

    "See, the thing is, it isn't like there's a book I read or person I talked to that just made so much sense I decided to Believe, you know? It's...personal. I mean, there's a saying, 'It's a relationship, not a religion'. I don't like it because it's like correcting people that are just trying to communicate which is hard enough without, um, splitting hairs, you know? But it's true. I believe God is real because I have actual, personal interactions with Him. It's not a logical argument thing. I pray. I tell Him I don't get it, or I screwed up or I can't handle it or whatever...and I can feel Him listening and caring and answering. He's as real to me as you are. So, you know, if someone came up to me and logically proved that you didn't exist, like shot down all my arguments for your existence and was just a better debator was...it wouldn't shake my faith that you really I exist. I'd be like, 'I just hung out with him, and had a conversation...you know?"


    Kaze sighs again. "Same thing if someone told me that you were like a mass murderer or that nothing you said was true or whatever. I'd be like, 'Hey I know Crystal. That's just not what he's like.'. So yeah, I believe God is totally in charge, and totally good, and the obvious questions like, 'why is everything screwed up and why do people get hurt that totally don't deserve it and other people that do deserve it don't?' are totally valid, but don't really faze me as far as me believing God is good. I believe that there is a big picture, and it is honestly too big for me, but God makes it simple by letting me get to know Him, so I can trust him even with everything not making sense to me."

    He looks at Crystal. "Okay, sorry. That's a lot. The bottom line is, if you have any curiosity about God...I would say...try talking to Him, and see what happens. But really try, you know, like persistently over time. When my mom died, and my dad left...I really felt like no one was there when I prayed. That was me, because I was hurting so bad, because everyone basically left me, and I felt like no one wanted anything to do with me, including God. It took like...fifteen years before I got to a point where I could believe He cared about me again. But you know what? The same thing happened with my friends. I just couldn't really register it when they tried to say they cared. Now...I can believe it, like here and now, I am not thinking you're just humoring me and dying to get out of here and don't really want anything to do with me. I used to feel that way about everyone." Kaze says passionately.

    "But the thing is, all of those friends eventually got tired of me pushing them away, and moved on and left me behind. But not God. He's the only one what I have a relationship with now, that I did before all that happened. He waited and was right there still when I could hear Him again."

    He sighs again. "Whew! Sorry, Crystal. It was a hard time for me, like really dark. I know that's probably a lot more than you wanted to know, and maybe not even a little bit helpful. That's just how it worked for me." He says.


    Then Kaze screws up! When Crystal is obviously hurt by Kaze's teasing, Kaze immediately looks concerned and repentant!

    "Oh man, dude. I am so sorry. I...maybe you noticed, I try to be really polite all the time? That's because if I don't, I can be a real jerk. I didn't mean anything by it, I was just being stupid. I mean, I tried to cast a spell too, and mine failed. I...dude, forgive me, please?"
    Spells: Monthly Rits Transform Aura (aura appears to be a sleeper) Spell Cloaks (See mini-sheet)

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  15. #18
    Crystal's Avatar
    Striking Looks
    (Captivating)
    Manipulation
    (Disarming)
    Resources
    Barfly
    Eidetic Memory
    Crystal

    Nimbus

    Walls and the Floor become slightly tilted, there's a sickly sweet and sharp smell in the air. Faintly, the sound chains (and even fainter: the sound of leather) can be heard. More powerful spells make the sounds more pronounced and colors seem to pulsate.
    Active Stats

    Astral Dive II
    Health:
    Mana:
    WP:
    Armor 0
    Defense 2

    Vulgar +/-0
    Active Spells: 1/4
    Personal Spells: 1

    [2] Third Eye
    [4R] Misperception

    +1
    SL
    3
    PRE

    Crystal listened to Kaze's explanation and scoffed involuntarily. "Shit then I guess we're just about opposites: see, I don't think there's any way to say this without sounding like an asshole, but I never really had to struggle or work for anything in my life. Things just.. worked out or happened or were already there. I live day to day all the time and I don't think this is going to get me anywhere in the long run."

    "I mean, obviously I have an agenda here, to pick your brains about stuff that's bothering me - but I'm all for enjoying the moment, to not think about the future. You say you don't have a plan, but since I've known you you've gone from dreaming about becoming an actor to actually landing a leading part in a show. That's impressive, whether you like it or not."

    He should probably slow down a bit with the alcohol, but Crystal looked at the glass defiantly and emptied it yet again. "I guess I'm just kind of pissed at whatever looked at me and went 'this soul right here. That's prime Awakening material!' I could have lived in ignorance, just riding that wave I was riding all along, but I just had to get all this insight and Magic and what-not, only to find out I'm not actually allowed to use it and now I have all this extra responsibility and expectation and it sucks." The Mastigos was blissfully unaware of just how entitled this rant sounded.

    Kaze's view on religion had Crystal listen silently and respectfully. That guy knew how to talk, how to sell this. Whether he liked to admit it or not, this gave Crystal a lot to think about. Fuck, maybe he would actually try praying some day?

    "Wow. I mean, I don't have any other smart thing to add, but I think you're the truest believer I've ever met." Which didn't really say much, considering the circles he was moving in. Also, like Kaze said earlier: maybe it's an Obrimos thing. "One question though: why did you keep trying for years even without getting any answer?"

    He smiled a sympathetic smile. "Don't apologize - I mean, you don't see me apologizing for glooming around. I'm.. glad you shared this."


    How could you stay mad at someone that acted like a puppy whose tail you just stepped on? Crystal sighed. "It's fine. You couldn't know and there was nothing wrong per se with what you said. For all it's worth: I still don't think you have a single bad bone in your body and if that's the product of your serious introspection then you've done an incredible job at changing." He exhaled and leaned his head back. He felt the beginning of a buzz, something that promised to be much more with a little more time. Without moving again he continued. "You're forgiven, just don't-" Don't what? "Ugh, whatever. Forgiven."
    Health: Willpower: Mana:


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  17. #19
    Kaze's Avatar
    Striking Looks
    (An Extremely Fit and Healthy Glow)
    Presence
    (Disconcertingly easy to talk to and open up)
    Toxin Resistance
    (+2 vs drugs, alcohol and toxins)
    New Identity(Steven Chojun Trueheart)
    Kaze

    Nimbus. The sound of rushing wind and flashes of lightning surround Kaze, and his clothes and hair move as if he is in a windstorm.
    Monthly Rits

    Monthly Rits Spell Cloaks Spells do not show unless scrutinized
    Transform Aura pot 1 (Aura is as a Sleeper)
    Organic Resilience (Life Mage Armor 2e) pot 3 ( Armor 2; Defense 2 + Higher of Dex or Wits)
    Body Mastery pot 1 (x2 rate healing Bash, Letha, Agravated; +1 success on all extended and instant rolls to resist diseases, poisons or drugs; +100 years lifespan)

    Scene specific spells: in mini-sheet 4
    Scene Specific

    (Portrait) Portrait of an Angel
    Health:
    Mana:
    WP:
    Armor 3 ( +1 vs Bashing: Kung Fu 1)
    Defense 5
    Vulgar -1
    Active Spells: 3/5
    Personal Spells: 3
    Spell Tolerance: 3/3 Spell Rolls
    [1]Transform Aura[M]
    [2] Supernal Vision[D]
    [2] Organic Resilience[M]
    Key: Potency | Effect declaration if needed | Turns remaining ("M" = Monthly Ritual)

    (Bad House) The Return
    Health:
    Mana:
    WP:
    Armor 3 ( +1 vs Bashing: Kung Fu 1)
    Defense 9 (Dex 6 from Honing the Form)
    Vulgar -1
    Active Spells: 3/5
    Personal Spells: 3
    Spell Tolerance: 3/3 Spell Rolls
    [4] Honing the Form
    [3] Organic Resilience Aurora's Life 5
    [2] Body Control [M]
    Key: Potency | Effect declaration if needed | Turns remaining ("M" = Monthly Ritual)

    +2
    SL
    3
    PRE

    Kaze listens and cocks his head curiously when Crystal scoffs and says he never experienced struggle and lives day to day, but isn't happy about it. "So...I'm just trying to figure this out...I think you're saying that you're bugged by the idea that what you're doing right now isn't going to get you anywhere...but...where do you want to get?" He asks.

    "Okay, honestly, the first time I really ever hung with you was when we went clubbing, and the way you kind of looked out for Skye, made sure she was okay, when there was nothing in it for you...that was cool; that was when I felt like I wanted to get to know you better; like you were the kind of person I could end up being really good friends with, you know?" Kaze says. "So...I'm thinking, every day you go through where you look out for someone or even just pass up a chance to take advantage of someone...is a good day, you know?"

    Kaze laughs, "Okay now hang on." He says, "You know me, and how much of a beginner I am at acting! You just got through saying, I think, that you were just kind of lucky, and didn't work for what you got, right? Same! I mean, sure I took the chance to sign up for the audition and go down there...but you know I don't have the acting chops for a leading role! Maybe not yet, at least! They picked me for my 'look'! That's the same kind of thing I think you were just saying happened to you, right? You feel like you got good stuff you didn't deserve?" He asks.

    Kaze gauges Crystal's drinking and figures he'll let Crystal sleep at his place if he wants--e still has a futon in the living room--but he will offer to detox Crystal magically instead at the end of the night.

    When Crystal talks about being angry that God or the Universe or whatever chose him for Awakening, Kaze listens.

    "Yeah." Kaze says. "I get it. I mean...my Awakening was okay. I feel like I was kind of...prepared. But before that...years before, I used have all these thoughts...and I used to wish I was a bird. I mean, I told people it was so I could fly, and that was true, but really? It was so I could be dumb and not know about any of the things that I was hurting about...not think, you know?"

    Kaze grins, "By the way, now that I can do it? Being a bird is awesome, though! Really!" He says. "What I didn't expect though, is being a dolphin is better!"

    Kaze can tell Crystal is listening when he talks about how it is for him, with God. He listens when Crystal talks about how it impacts him to hear it. He resists deflecting when Crystal calls him the 'Truest Believer' he's met. He thinks it's probably more likely that he's just the truest believe that Crystal has ever actually asked about their relationship with God. He imagines that isn't something Crystal has asked many people. But that's not the point. Crystal is telling him that he gets it. Gets him. That's a big deal.

    "Thanks, Crystal." Kaze says.

    Then Crystal asks him why he kept trying, kept praying, even though it felt like no one was listening.

    Kaze smiles. "Honestly, I was just that desperate, and even though it felt like He wasn't listening, I was sure that no one else was." He says.

    Kaze smiles again and nods when Crystal accepts his apology. No need to say anything more about that. Moving on. Mental note though, maybe don't bring up Mind and definitely don't ask Crystal for pointers, if he gets around to trying to learn the arcana. If he does, maybe just mention sometime when he is actually studying it, and let Crystal say something or not.
    Spells: Monthly Rits Transform Aura (aura appears to be a sleeper) Spell Cloaks (See mini-sheet)

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  19. #20
    Crystal's Avatar
    Striking Looks
    (Captivating)
    Manipulation
    (Disarming)
    Resources
    Barfly
    Eidetic Memory
    Crystal

    Nimbus

    Walls and the Floor become slightly tilted, there's a sickly sweet and sharp smell in the air. Faintly, the sound chains (and even fainter: the sound of leather) can be heard. More powerful spells make the sounds more pronounced and colors seem to pulsate.
    Active Stats

    Astral Dive II
    Health:
    Mana:
    WP:
    Armor 0
    Defense 2

    Vulgar +/-0
    Active Spells: 1/4
    Personal Spells: 1

    [2] Third Eye
    [4R] Misperception

    +1
    SL
    3
    PRE

    "See that's the point. I don't know. If I hadn't Awakened I know I could have just dicked around for the rest of my life, but now I feel I need to do something with all of this. And my mind's just coming up with blanks."

    Memory about that particular night was pretty hazy, so Crystal just shrugged. "I mean, seeing as you were mostly virgins in that field I couldn't just leave you hanging out there." Still, one good deed a day? That's it?
    He threw up his hands when Kaze started arguing formalities with his acting gig. "It's not a competition on who's trying less, but I'll grant you that point. Ugh, maybe I'll just have to watch you more closely and just do whatever it is you're doing - from my point of view you've got it figured out pretty well." Was he giving the Obrimos too much credit? Maybe, but the alternative was the earlier mentioned introspection and he was just not feeling that at the moment. "Also I've never argued the point that I didn't deserve shit. It's just that my natural talents got me that far." Yeah, that sounded dickish, even to him. "I know, I know. But it's the truth."


    When Kaze talked about his Awakening Crystal arched an eyebrow. "So you can actually do that?" His first instinct was to congratulate him, but then he thought of all the things that could go wrong there and clammed up. "You fully trust in something to watch over you, trust that nothing could answer when you reach out through the Abyss like that?"

    Shit, here they were talking profound matters and at the same time they're using codenames like kids playing pretend. "Hey, I'm Michael. Not Chris, Chris is just an annoyingly popular name to go incognito by." Smart? No. Something he would have done if he was sober? No. Overly trusting? Just about. But if there was anyone not intending on harming Crystal sympathetically it would be this actor-in-training. "And I don't expect you to give me your real name - I just felt stupid sharing all this personal stuff without telling you my real name. I mean, with the ammount of ammunition I've been giving you I'd be fucked either way if you decided to screw me over.
    Health: Willpower: Mana:


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