The night was chilly, and the Nix hugged her jacket closer to her body. With the shop closed for the night, she found herself walking. To where? She didn’t know, and didn’t care. But she needed to think.

Years upon years of her mother’s belittling and abuse had corrupted part of her. Part of her confidence and part of her heart. Learning that if you were not perfect had consequences, but none that left marks. That wouldn’t be acceptable. Learning that if you were not perfect you were worthless, was ingrained in her very soul.

Mark had taken advantage of that. Luring her with pretty words and empty promises. Letting her believe she was loved and safe, only to twist reality and turn her into what he needed. The drugs made her reliance on him stronger, she needed him, and them, to survive. Once again, part of her withered and died.

The very night she almost died, could taste death on her lips and its cold embrace around her body, she thought she was finally free. But her Keeper found her and changed that. New chains were attached to her, a cage placed over her, and the last of her heart withered and died.

The park was where she found herself, burrowing herself deeper into her coat. She didn’t want attention tonight, she didn’t want someone randomly talking to her, trying to get her number.

As she walked, she realized something. Her heart wasn’t as cold and dead as she thought. Lately, it had begun to beat anew. Tiny parts fluttering to life with a touch or a look.

Though with that beat came a cold reality. This was someone that was out of her league. Someone intelligent, well educated. And she was, well, not. Her heart was leading her down a path of heartache, teasing her with feelings and things she couldn’t have. Those flutters laughing at her inner torment, delighting in her pain.

But she wasn’t sure if she wanted that. A cold heart was safe, it couldn’t be hurt anymore. She didn’t want to hurt anymore. And yet, she was feeling things. Things she never thought were possible for her. The girl with the voice who dreamed of big things, yet was confined and abused.

Could she feel again? Something was going on, there was no denying it.

Though more importantly, did she want to feel again? The pain of before was still real, the scars were still fresh and deep.

She pauses in her steps, looking up into the night sky. And it dawned on her.

Could she be cared about or even loved? Would some want the damage and the baggage that came with her? Was she worthy of love? What terrified her the most? She honestly didn’t know.

A cold sensation slides down her gilded cheek and she quickly wiped it away with a shaking hand.