Ashes Between the Pages

[Alice Hart]

"Right. Right..." she calms, it was like the memory of her walking under her own power fled, retreating into the darkness that this moment had born witness too. She nods, trying to smile, but knowing that she failed, as she recalls the sound of dirt against her shoe as she dragged her feet along. "Okay, so it'll take practice. And I got nothing but time right?"

Her hand stills under Robert's, but her fingers don't release their grip. "No, no, no!" She says shaking her head, "You sleep where you normally do. And...and I'll sleep in a corner, or-or under your desk if I have to!" It was a compromise, Alice doubts that she'd ever stop feeling guilty if she her new darkness were to cause Robert to move from where he'd claimed for his daysleep.

[Robert Cross]

Cross returns her faltering smile, forgetting for a moment that she can't see his encouraging grin. "Yeah, that's one thing you don't have to worry about, right?" Their timelessness often frightens Cross, or at least boggles his mind. But not on this occasion. Right now, it's comforting to know that Alice has as long as she needs to figure this out. He squeezes her hand to drive his point home. "And I know you'll make it work."

His smile widens at her resistance to taking his space. Once again, Alice has charmed him completely. "Okay, okay...I give in. You'll stay with me. I have to warn you though, I use a sleeping bag on the floor. We can set you up with one too, if it won't be too uncomfortable for you." Cross has no idea how the other Undead sleep. But, for him, it's a purely utilitarian exercise. He lies down, his eyes close, and they open again. End of story. Beds are for living things, not monstrous walking corpses. And it's not like he gets sore. Accordingly, he no longer worries about matters of comfort, not that he was that concerned as a Breather.

"So...how are you feeling?" He asks, watching her closely, trying to read her face as she responds.

[Alice Hart]

Alice nods, her thoughts quickly turn into voiced words. "It's still weird. Wrapping my mind around forever....three and a half years ago I wheedled my way into going to a public school. Collage. Whatever. And now...and now I need to figure out how to make being a blind vampire work, for forever..." The smile the doll gives Robert is a shaky, weak thing, but the corners of her mouth are upturned, so it that to count for something right? "Thanks for thinking...I can." she whispers.

"Was that so hard?" she asks as her shaky smile, solidifies into a forced-fake victory grin. "A sleeping bag on the floor? Please! I was sleeping in a bathtub before all this!" her free hand waves towards her empty sockets.

"That...is a loaded question." she starts after a moment. "But...you know that." She takes another moment, "I'm scared. Terrified. I don't know how I'm going to continue my nights. Even if we know it's possible. There's a cold dread in my stomach just thinking about going to Court. All the predators of the Domain circling around me, wanting to strike before I can turn this weakness into a strength....The Prince, his Beast is hidden. What if I run into him and don't know it. What if I insult him and don't know it until I'm dead. Or worse!" Her brows are raised in fright. "What if-what if-what if-!" she says in quick succession. Her fingers start pulling at Robert's jacket once more, "That's where my mind is. I don't know what's going to happen. And I don't know how to plan to react to all of these unknowns, but you said you'd help. I trust you. I know you'll be there...but when you're not...." The pulling stops, and Alice has a fistful of his jacket in a death grip.

[Robert Cross]

Again his smile is stronger than hers, more encouraging, "It does a number on all of us, trust me." Cross is getting better every night when it comes to confronting the facts of their existence, but he still finds his default mode is to focus on what's directly ahead of him. One day after another. Perfect, they all fit. Still, he's not exactly happy with this coping strategy, which is one reason he's gravitated toward the Lancea Sanctum. Understanding, an unflinching acceptance of what he is...

"And not think, know. I know you can do it, Alice." She may not believe him, but Cross knows she's strong, stronger than many of the other monsters in the Domain by far.

His laugh comes quickly when she brags about her bathtub sleeping arrangement, as rough and gravelly as ever. "A bathtub, huh? You're one tough cookie, you know that?" He's teasing, but there's a note of true appreciation in her voice.

As Alice unwinds her worries, Cross simply listens, his hand still on hers. He'd asked the question knowing this would be the result, but it's best she express her fears, voice them in order to confront them. When she's done he answers simply, directly: "You're right to be afraid. You'd be stupid if you weren't. Still, there's nothing to do but move forward. It's going to be hard, yes. But I won't let anyone hurt you. No one. And I'm sure that I'm not the only one who'll be there to help..."

He pauses, a touch of humor entering his voice again: "And I think you'll know when you're speaking to the Prince. I know I can't forget his voice." At least you don't have to see those eyes. "And then there's the fact that everyone is always greeting him and addressing him as 'Your Highness' or 'Your Majesty.' You hear people start to bow and scrape, you do the same." It's a joke, but also points to something serious: she has to learn to use the reactions of those around her to gauge the social climate.

[Alice Hart]

Alice nods making a sound of agreement. "True enough...but I don't know if I want to find out how I'll react when forever is a matter of course, forgetting about the small things, and focusing on the big..." The doll doesn't want the Wraith's Ice to take over, freezing a sheet between her and the world.

The confidence in Robert's voice pulls the doll from her panic. "Really?" she 'looks' up, "You're not just saying that?" the doll asks, her voice still soft, but firmer then anything she'd said tonight, because there was something small, and uncertain, always wailing out, crippling her confidence from within, needed to know. Because if his words were just spoken to placate her, that small thing, growing smaller and smaller the more she'd spent within the Domain would would cease it's steady shrinking, and grow, and grow and grow until it completely crippled her.

'that blind old haunt. a rat slinking in the shadows of the sewers' she could just hear the taunts beginning...and that was the nicest thing her mind was thinking of.

His laugh is what she'd been aiming for, her too-wide-fake-fake smile greets the gravelly sound, morphing into a bitten lip and a giggle when she hears the the teasing, but appreciative tone of Robert's voice, "I don't think anyone's ever called me a 'touch cookie' before."

Her worries, her fright, Robert's voice cuts through like a hot knife through butter. Her fingers don't relax, but she stop pulling more of the fabric of his jacket into her fist. Her mind travels along the lines for kindred she knew, and those she'd call her friend. 'Robert will be there,' her mind says, 'Joseph....can he be trusted? Or will he throw me to the wolves? Gilroy....my Regent....I need a sepulcher. Garrick - our charges....Konrad...is hunted....Katya...I need to talk to Katya....'

Her fingers relax when Robert's humor penetrates her spiraling thoughts, she laughs, "But what if he's not speaking?!" she asks, it's a concern, another of her 'what if's' but her tone is a mock horrified stage whisper. "Hmm....true, that's very true. I can bow and scrape with the best of them." she joins in with the joke, her tone a touch wry, her previous panic set aside.

[Robert Cross]

"I don't think you'll be forgetting about the small things anytime soon," he replies. After all, given her newfound sightlessness, Cross figures she'll be focusing on putting one foot in front of the other for the foreseeable future. "If you do, I'll give you a good talking to." Again, the joke carries with it a serious undertone.

"And yes, really. You're stronger than you give yourself credit for, Alice." He doesn't address her second question. Cross doesn't 'just say' things, especially to those he values. And Alice is someone he values above all others. "You just have to believe in yourself. And keep going. Giving up isn't an option."

"Good," he laughs. "Bow and scrape away." His hand leaves hers and then, a moment later, she feels him touching, gently, her hair. If she could see, she'd know he's gazing at her with a look that conveys a whole world of emotion: admiration, affection, fear, respect, and sadness. "You're going to get through this. I promise." His hand stays there for a moment, a lingering caress, and is gone.

"Okay. Enough time with the books, let's go start getting you settled." His sudden change in topic isn't jarring. It's just that there's nothing he needs to add to his gesture. He knows she'll know what it means.

Shall we call it a wrap? I'll leave it to you to make the final post. Another great scene!

[Alice Hart]

"True enough. I do have a lot of little things to figure out before the big things can cloud my mind," she says, thinking much like Robert that learning how to navigate was first on the agenda, "Ahh, as long as you're around to give me a talking to." Her voice light, a smile plain to see, and hear.

Robert's conviction makes her gape. No one had ever said she was a strong person. They told her to get better. To do better. Never that she already was. Shyly she nods, "I guess so."

Alice has to admit, at least to herself that making Robert laugh was quickly becoming her new favorite thing. "At I won't be alone in all that bowing and scraping." she muses. Then his hand moves, touching her ghostly mane, no one likes to touch the creepy dead-doll-girl. She's shocked, her own fingers reach up to where she feel his touch, but her show slows her hand, and when she finds her hair, Robert had already retreated.

Right now, more then anything Alice wishes she can stare at Robert, confustion mixed with a slow understanding.

"Okay," a nod. "Do you even have another sleeping bag?" she asks matching her tone to his, "Because I might have a wardrobe full of a myriad of fabric back home, it doesn't mean that I thought to buy a sleeping bag, not when I had a perfectly good bathtub."

I'm good to wrap. This was amazingly fun!

[Robert Cross]

Cross stands and helps her up, taking her hand to lead her out of the annals. As they retreat into the dark, he laughs again, softly. "You're right, I don't. But you can just use mine..."

End scene.