Movies

[Frost]

I agree, this movie was amazing. The Force Awakens was very disappointing to me as it reminded me of my son when he throws a tantrum. Granted he is not as destructive, but the characters in The Force Awakens were very flat and basic to me. However, Rogue One made up for the lapse. I am planning to see it a second time in theaters once the hype dies down a bit and I don't have to share a theater with a thousand talking, phone scrolling igits during a movie. It was the only time I seriously considered dumping my popcorn on the people in front of me.

[West]

Jack Reacher 2 - Never Go Back

Jack Reacher rescues Maria Hill from the HYDRA takeover of SHIELD.

Errr... wait. *ahem* Jack Reacher rescues Major Turner from a Blackwater-style infestation of the US Army. Sorry! Couldn't resist. Mostly because, well, Cobie's totally doing her Maria Hill schtick (and I totally love her doing it). Never could stand HIMYM but any time Cobie gets all steely-eyed with her steel blues and sets that jaw, mmmmMMMMMMM.

It's a loose adaptation of the recently published book, and most of the changes are for the better. It's paced... okay... and is enjoyable, but leaves a lot of char-dev feeling half developed. It's pretty clear that Cruise is searching for a franchise and this movie feels like it has a higher production value than the first Jack Reacher. I still think it's an odd choice given the physical disparity between Cruise and RAW (Reacher-As-Written ) is a turn-off for 'Reacher' fans, and it's not a big-name draw for non-Reacher fans.

Watchable. Possibly kid-friendly -- just violence.

On a side note... it's pretty eerie... because close-ups at certain angles make it super-obvious that Tom Cruise has been Botox'ing it up -- which gives his face a swollen, waxy look. Which is incredibly oddly similar to his post-wreck face in Vanilla Sky. Like, prophetic, dude.

[West]

I'm making my prediction, so you'll have read it here first if I'm right.

Doctor Strange refers to three medical cases in the opening. The first is obviously Rhodes / War Machine in a Civial War reference.

I'm calling #3 as Lodestone, as a teaser for the Masters of Evil showing up as the foil to the upcoming Defenders.

[West]

Passengers

Two souls find love amidst the stars!

I dunno. I gave it a watch because I totally loved Silver Linings Playbook and Pratt is a funny guy. It paces well, has a decent story, and some really nice visuals if you're into grandiose sci-fi spectacles. The robot bartender is a scene stealer.

But here's the thing.

Pratt is stranded alone and wakes up Lawrence. Knowing damn well he's consigning her to the same fate but she's just so pretty and witty on her profile page. It's addressed, and a third waker even throws shade about it. But at the end of the day they fall in looooove and that makes it okay. Right? Not really. Not for me. This is like 'The Astronauts Wife' (which was waaaay worse) for me; that is, there's this icky Stockholm Syndrome attached to the whole 'romance' that completely sabotages and subverts any sort of wholesome goodness about it as a 'love' story.

Not my cup of tea.

[Yumyumcrow]

I felt the same way, too.

Great premise but the whole thing turns on his action but they focus on a romance!? It didn't work and well, the way they ended it was saccharide.

They could have made a very dark, thought provoking, movie here but they chickened out.

Better yet, they could have ignored the whole situation (which was the way the trailer's suggested it would happen).

Disappointing.

[West]

Underworld: Blood Wars

In for a penny, in for a pound. Kate's getting a bit long in the tooth and nowhere is her plastic surgery more noticeable than under white makeup and contrasting with black outfits. It's kind of a shame, she doesn't look anything like she used to, but at least now we all know what Doll Face could look like.

BW picks up where the last left off: everyone wants Selene's kid, but then there's a hard pivot into Vampire politicking that encompasses most of the movie. Oh, and Selene learns how to enter The Twilight Sacred Realm and frosts her tips. It ends with a passing of the torch as the movie begins to focus more on Four (what will Tris do without him) and ends on Selene's daughter.

There's a lot of things that are 'meh' but it's also very obvious it's not a 'Len Wiseman' movie. For any Vampire fan, the Coven (Domain) structures are fleshed out and the Elder world is expanded a bit. Honestly, it's probably the best part of these movies lately. For BBC Sherlock fans, apparently Irene Adler was Embraced. Lara Pulver is fucking delicious, but she's essentially playing the same character/personality she always does... but does so well.

If you're a Underworld fan, it's worth seeing. Much better than Underworld: Awakening. If you're not, there's too much baggage from previous movies for this to make any sense.

Unless, you know, you want to see a coven of Vampires lounging around and being treacherous monsters

[West]

Collateral Beauty

I couldn't help but be curious about seeing this between the fantastic cast list (Helen Mirren!) and rampant stories about reviews assassinating the movie before it opened.

In a nutshell, it's about a man who loses his daughter and goes into a funk. His partners get worried about their business tanking and latch on to the fact that he writes letters to Love, Death, and Time to hire actors ala A Christmas Carol to come visit him as those incarnations.

The reviews are overly harsh, but not inaccurate. It does tug at your heartstrings in a ham-handed, rote way. Will Smith is mostly teary-eyed and taciturn and seems to be taking the movie waaaaaay more seriously than the rest of the cast. There are muddy messages about grief and acceptance that don't really get validated (or explained).

But that doesn't make it a bad movie.

Under the main focus of the movie are supporting cast with interesting problems. There's a twist at the end (spoiler below if you're not going to see it) that's well played. But the thing that interested me is that the hired actors helped the sub-cast with their sub-plots that centered around... you guessed it: Love, Death, and Time. The idea that maybe they actually were those incarnations (ala Piers Anthony's Incarnations of Immortality series) and not just hired actors cast the movie in a different light for me.

It's not a good movie. But it's not a bad movie.

The biggest irony here is that the title is most appropriate for the film itself. Amidst all the wrong things, there are potential bits to enjoy.

The Reveal

The grief counselor/group therapy leader Will Smith finally goes to see is... actually his former wife. The forced conversation turns and ham-handed pairing of them wasn't a terribly written shoe-horned bad-decision-by-writers romance that it felt like throughout, but hints at the 'game' that they were playing for each other to handle his grief.

[West]

Logan

Logan and Professor X find a new mutant, X-23, the genetic offspring of Wolverine. Mayhem ensues, and the franchise is handed off to the next generation... or possible The New Mutants (the younger brand/team of the X-Men). It's also set in 2029, so there's wiggle room.

A lot of my friends have talked about it being a soulful dirge, great send off, etc. Meh. It's premise is based on Wolverine's last days, having been poisoned by the Adamantium in his body and Professor X being stricken by an age-induced degenerative brain disease. It's not a particularly good story, being one long chase scene, nor does it have anything remarkable in the way of cinematography or fight scenes other than finally letting go of the PG rating. Jackman spends most of the movie limping and coughing. I also can't help but feel it's a huge contradiction to Days of Future Past, which already gave us a look at the X-Men in the future. Didn't look like Wolverine was dying from Adamantium poisoning there, yo. But, hey, the X-verse has been a massive clusterfuck for a while, so it's all good.

As a standalone movie, I'll give it a solid 'meh'.

...but it's also the end of an era. A swan song for arguably the whole fucking reason we have wonderful comic-based movies and the MCU. Some of you may not remember what comic book movies were like nearly twenty years ago. Few and far between, no TV shows, and the ones that cropped up sucked. Bad. So bad. But we watched them out of desperation because there was nothing else.

Then it happened.

I still remember seeing Jackman turn around for the first time wearing a wife beater in that cage fight. The anvil sound fx when he slammed his fist into the other guys, and that snarl and raw charisma. Mind: blown. Holy shit, y'all, it's fucking Wolverine. And in the middle of a pretty bad (but pretty good for the time) movie, he owned that shit. Like a fucking animal. And made us believe, and started a snowball.

Fuck, I'll miss that guy. If you love the Wolverine, or even the state of movies today, you owe it to Hugh Jackman to watch it. It's the end of a 17-year run that won't be matched in impact or tenure by anyone again. He was the hero we needed and deserved.

[West]

Just because a name caught my eye and I could pause it...

I'm sure someone on Reddit or some such posted it long ago, but... the Dead Pool board from Deadpool off the top of my head:

Bill Cosby		Kid Rock
Charlie Sheen		Mike Tyson
Kanye West		Judd Nelson
Wade Wilson		Lil Wayne
Vladimir Putin		Shia Labeouf
John Wilkes Boothe (unsure)		Ned Beatty
Ryan Reynolds (plays Deadpool)		Rob Liefield (created Deadpool)
T.J. Miller (plays the bartender Deadpool is talking to)		Ozzy Osbourne
Lindsey Lohan		Amanda Bynes
Miley Cyrus

[West]

Spider-Man

Realized I never followed this up. With 'Homecoming' just around the corner, watched these two again this weekend.

The Amazing Spider-Man 2

I know the 'grimdark' movies have been a bit out of vogue since they've been overdone and Marvel proved a lighter touch made for fantastic movies but... I love the shit out of this for being grimdark.

In short, SM2 is the continuing adventures of Spider-Man and the rise of Electro and the Green Goblin. It also continues to world-build and sets the stage for the Sinister Six, ending with Rhino and teasing Vulture and Doc Ock. But that's not why I love the movie. It has some mis-steps here and there, particularly with the villains and some overdone CGI with said villains (the CGI with Spider-Man is impeccable).

I love it for being the story/denouement of Gwen Stacy.

There was a time when I was a Spidey nerd and read the comics religiously. Decades have passed, so it's not a thing anymore, but there was a time when Gwen Stacy was a thing. A really big thing. Peter Parker was always defined by two great deaths; his uncle Ben for not being Spider-Man, and Gwen Stacy for being Spider-Man.

This is probably my favorite Emma Stone performance(s) ever. She breathes life into the character and both movies make Gwen more than just a pretty face or crush. She's the first person Peter shared his secret with, and can keep up with him in the science / brains department. And I totally applaud the movie for going there and giving the The Night Gwen Stacy Died a wonderful treatment.

Most grimdark movies are bent on 'flipping the script' and showing a darker or grittier side of the protagonist, but this one does so by choosing one of the most iconic story-lines and not shying away from the tragedy. It's a gripping payoff from two full movies worth of attention given to developing the relationship and letting it have it's playful, fun moments.

Gwen aside, the Amazing movies also have fantastic sequences of Spider-Man in action and really define him with a 'body language' better than the Toby trilogy or even Civil War.

Definitely worth seeing both.